League News 4-24-2008

"League News 4-24-2008"

The first major milestone in five years has been accomplished by the Nahant Men's Softball League. The NSL has been granted a permit to build a new left field fence to our desired specifications (6' high x 150' long). The permit is contingent on the league providing the necessary finances to cover the price of the fence and its installation.

In the wake of this permitting, and the good weather that has graced us this past week, a plethora of activity at the field and in peoples minds regarding the NSL has followed. Practices and scrimmages have been held daily and already there have been two Barbarian and Screaming Seagull sightings, one was of a Barbarian feasting on the alpha male seagulls head (rapped in a pita with low-fat raspberry vinaigrette dressing), for leaking information to the press.

In all seriousness, this has been an exciting week, as members of all teams have that spring fever and desire to return to the diamond.The DPW has been contacted and have expressed their interest in helping out as grounds crew whenever possible. A load of clay was dropped off at the field and members of the league help resurface the entire infield, including the third base line, which was well below grade. Also, the dugouts were dug out to a 2-inch depth and a border of scrap wood was constructed around the perimeter for a future crushed stone/stone dust surface. The access dirt from the bench areas was used to fill various depressions in the outfield, including the crater behind the street-side dugout.

Surprisingly, the newest team to the NSL, Captains Seaside has held more full-squad practices than any other team. Led by Coach Bart Bennet who coined the phrase "my asshole was puckerin", the Captains team has fervor unmatched by most teams in the league. Their owner, and roast beef curtain extraordinaire, George Mastoras was also in attendance, greeting players from both sides. George is excited to finally be part of the league that has financed his best selling items, beer, cigarettes, and chewing tobacco.

The NSL has also financed personal items for Mr. Mastoras, including a Hummer, a jet ski, and a pet iguana.In related news, George Mastoras was asked for a contribution to the league. He offered $500, to finance bleachers with the Captains Seaside logo on them.The NSL is well on its way to becoming a premier league in the area. There is money allotted for bleachers and a left field fence, both of which have been approved by the town.

Bleachers
George from Captains $500.00
Total $500.00

Left Field Fence
Carlo and the Barbarians $500.00
League $200.00
Greensox $150.00
Mike Caira's Dad $100.00
Total $950.00

The most valuable player of spring training goes to Vlad "Pepperoni Nipples" Arkensyian. Not only has he vastly improved his skills in the field but is one of the most stand-up characters playing the game. During a spring training tilt between Captains and members of NFL and the Greensox, Vlad's nickname was shortened to just "nipples". Vlad was asked how he felt about the nickname and replied "bitch, these nipples are famous".

Various Spring Training Scores:Greensox 8 - NFL 4
Greensox/NFL 14 - Captains 12

The final Manager's meeting is scheduled for Wednesday May 6th, at 8pm at the Nahant Knights of Columbus.