Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Number 1 Rule in the NSL, No Crybabies

The Nahant Men's Softball League is a smorgasbord of people from all walks of life, although mostly Caucasian, middle class, everyone in the league has problems and they all have personal issues. Most of us went to the same elementary school, high school, college. Some of the players in the league have been competing with each other in competitive sports since we can remember. Some of us share the same office space. Some of us hate each other.

This league is an off-shoot of all of our illustrious sports careers that abruptly ended due to a freak injury, a baby momma, the discovery of pussy, old-age, or a drug problem. It is an outlet for middle-age men to take out their pent up aggression from their wives and girlfriends or bosses telling them what or what not to do.It is an excuse to once a week get out of the house and do something active so that the grim reaper doesn't catch up with our already flailing hearts. It's an excuse to get out and get totally inebriated with people who you normally wouldn't piss on if they were on fire.

When you hit a home-run in this league everything still goes silent, your face goes numb, and you pee a little in the baseball pants that are a little to small because of the second helping of San Daniele del Friuli ham dinner you had the previous night. That tater you hit gives you something else to brag about, other than the amount of times you jerked off in one day, or your new hair style.

Shit-talking is and always be a part of this league long after all of your ashes are being smoked in my peace pipe. Whining will not be tolerated nor will a cry baby-attitude. We have gone over the rules in all of our locker rooms, do you have any questions? Are you ready to fight? Are you ready to fight? LET'S GET IT ON!!!!!!!!!! Good Luck everyone, and a big fuck you from Nahant Men's Softball League Offices.


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